Ready, Aim, Poop!

“Ready, aim, fire!” I’m convinced that if my daughter could talk, she’d be saying that phrase every time I change her diaper.

During her week-long stay in the hospital, she successfully pooped on my mom, my husband, the nurses, and me. She’s a pro at fooling people into thinking she’s done pooping. She’ll let out a bunch of grunts, accomplish a few good poop explosions, and everything will be calm for quite awhile. “Time to change her diaper,” we’d all think.

The unsuspecting victim would calmly slide a new diaper underneath her, undo the dirty diaper, and get ready to wipe. Suddenly, out of nowhere, the changer would feel a warm, wet spray, and her hands would be covered with mustardy goo.

It was funny at first. Now that I often change her on our bed, however, it the laughter has turned to fear. I have enough to do during my day without having to add “wash sheets and comforter” to the list.

I suppose I could be better prepared. I could change her on a changing table, or lay a blanket underneath her to protect the bedding. I could always have a diaper partially covering her in case of an aftershock.

No matter how many precautions I take, however, there are always a few moments when I am utterly vulnerable. These are moments when she is in prime launching position, when all odds are in the favor of a successful mustard attack.

These are the moments when I’m holding both of her legs up in the air and I’m ready to wipe.

There’s nothing protecting me during these moments, and there’s no way around them. I have to lift her behind up in the air to be sure I’ve completely cleaned it. I can’t cover it up or I won’t be able to see if I’ve missed anything. I can’t keep my face partially turned away, or I won’t be able to get a good view. No, I have to face my fears, and allow myself to be in the most dangerous position possible.

I think she can sense my nervousness. Sometimes she lets a little gas escape, just to keep me on my toes. Every now and then, she’ll sneeze, making me cringe in anticipation of what the force of the sneeze might push out the other end.

Rent a suspense-filled movie on a Friday night? Nah. We’ve got diaper changing to keep us at the edge of our seats.

Baby: To Schedule, or Not To Schedule?

My husband and I never considered putting our baby on a schedule while I was pregnant, and we didn’t think about it after she was born. When we thought she was hungry, I nursed her, and when she seemed tired, we let her sleep.

I thought that was what most parents did, but as we talked to more and more new parents, we realized it’s very common for parents to get their babies on a regular schedule almost immediately.

I admit that there were some days when I wondered if I was hurting our daughter by having a “go-with-the-flow” attitude. I wondered if she might benefit from a more regular eating and sleeping routine. I usually dismissed those thoughts, though, because she was happy, and my husband and I were happy.

In addition to being happy, my daughter was also well-fed and well-rested.

Because I nursed her on demand, I never had trouble with low milk supply. Maybe my body would have produced an abundance of milk whether I fed her on demand or not, but I’ve read about and heard first-hand stories where women had extremely low amounts milk as a result of trying to get their babies on a schedule.

We never tried to force her to sleep when she wasn’t tired, and we never tried to keep her awake if she wanted to sleep, regardless of the time of day or night. This might have been easier for us than other families because she was our only child and we didn’t have to coordinate naps and bedtimes. In addition, I stay at home with her, so I can usually nap when she naps. Either way, it worked very well for us. Naps and bedtime weren’t stressful – we just waited until she was tired, then let her sleep (often in our arms and in our bed).

This non-schedule continued until she was about 5 ½ months old. At this time, she began making her own schedule. I noticed that she was getting tired, hungry, and ready for bed at about the same time each day. It was nice to follow her cues and plan her naps, feedings, and bedtimes accordingly.

Instead of wondering whether a parent-imposed routine would be a good idea or not, I’m confident and at peace with the routine our daughter chose for herself. It might not work for every family or with every child, but it sure worked for us!

Multitasking

My daughter has an insatiable curiosity these days. She wants to know what everyone is saying, doing, eating, and holding. She wants to touch and taste anything and everything she can get her drool-covered hands on. No more are the days when I can hold her on my lap and expect whatever food or drink is in my hand to remain un-spilled. I have to be on a constant guard.

I’ve always made a point to talk to her and explain everything I am doing. “Now Mommy is pouring the hot water into the mug for her tea,” or, “Daddy is taking out his computer to do his work.” I do this to help her develop a good vocabulary, and also to keep her entertained. Now that she likes to touch things, I make a point to talk about what I am doing and, whenever safe and appropriate, let her feel what I am doing.

She was a little cranky today and wanted to be walked, so I decided to take her on a tour of the house and let her touch and hear the names of everything. “Snowman,” “plant,” “picture frame,” and “TV” were some of the items she got to touch and hear the names of.

About 30 seconds into the tour, I was struck with a genius idea: Why not dust and tour at the same time?

You might not be excited about this idea, but I was. I’m at home all day with an almost 6–month-old child. She’s a people person. She likes to be held and talked to. On the other hand, my husband is a carefree sort of guy. The kind that puts things down when he’s finished with them, and then forgets to put them away. I’m constantly battling to keep my house clean and organized and also keep my baby happy. The idea that I could kill both birds with one stone filled me with joy.

We had a delightful 15-minute walk around the house. She was eager to look at, hear about, and touch everything I picked up, and I was relieved to wipe the dust from under each object. Happy baby? Check. Cleaner house? Check. Satisfied mother? Double check!

Cradle Cap

My daughter was born chubby, bald, and beautiful. It doesn’t look like she’ll have a full head of hair anytime soon. I didn’t see any reason we’d need one of those cute baby brushes for quite awhile, although we received a few as gifts.

As I was lying next to her one lazy afternoon, I thought about how I love having my hair brushed. It always relaxes me and feels so good. I decided brushing my daughter’s “hair” with a soft brush might feel good to her too. I got one out, and started softly brushing her head. She seemed to love it, appeared very relaxed, and was lying very still.

Suddenly, I noticed little white flakes floating in the air after each brush stroke. Having grown up with taking care of babies, I knew exactly what this was – cradle cap.

I continued brushing until the flakes stopped coming off. Then, I got on my computer to do a little research. (I have to admit, I go a little crazy with my computer research when it comes to my baby.) From everything I read, it seemed that no one really knows what causes cradle cap, and that, although it might not be pretty, it isn’t harmful to the baby. Satisfied that the cradle cap wasn’t a result of me being a bad mother who had a dirty baby, I decided to keep an eye on it and relax.

I recalled my mother telling me that when one of my siblings had cradle cap, a well-meaning friend told her, “Just leave it alone. It will go away on its own.” My mother cringes as she remembers how it indeed did not go away on its own. Instead, it got out of control, and thick. Yuck! I wasn’t letting that happen.

After doing a little trial and error with cradle cap control, I figured out a system that works very well for me. First, I wash my baby’s head gently with a washcloth each morning. I don’t put any shampoo or soap on it; I just use warm water. About once a week, I put a little baby lotion on her head (we use Aveeno Baby Daily Moisture Lotion) and brush it for about five minutes. I make sure to wash the brush with soap and water after I’m done.

This has completely taken care of the problem. Every now and then I see some yellowish patches on the top of her head, which I promptly take care of, but other than that, the cradle cap is a thing of the past.

New Mommy Must-Haves

When I try to think back on the first month of my daughter’s life, everything is a little hazy. It seems like all I did was hold her, feed her, change her diaper, and sleep. She was a relatively easy baby and slept pretty well from the get-go, but I still felt like I was in some sort of survival mode. Not only did I have a new baby to take care of, but my poor body took a while to recover from a tough 30-hour labor.

I don’t know how I would have made it through the first month without three items I happened to have on hand: stool softeners, frozen maxi pads, and a Moby Wrap.

Maybe you’re reading the phrase “stool softener” and wondering why it made the list. I’m not sure if my experience was unique, but going number two was terrifying for me after giving birth. Not only was I extremely sore (the doctor told me I had received the equivalent of about 15 stitches), but my number two wasn’t of a consistency that came out easily. To put it bluntly, I felt like I was trying to push rocks out, and that the rocks would tear my stitches. After spending agonizing hours in the bathroom, thinking to myself that I’d rather go through another 30-hour labor than be in this situation, I finally began to take stool softeners regularly. Trips to the bathroom were still scary, but a lot more manageable.

I wasn’t prepared for how much pain I would be in after I was finished giving birth. I had heard labor was painful, but no one prepared me for the aftermath. The hospital had ice packs for me to use “down there,” but they didn’t get quite cold enough to relieve the pain and soreness. Once I got home, I bought a pack of overnight maxi pads with wings, put water in the middle of them, and put them in the freezer. These home-made ice packs gave the best relief out of anything else I had tried. They fit perfectly in regular underwear, and were so refreshingly cold.

The stool softeners and frozen maxi pads were very important, but my number one, most-needed baby product, one that I highly recommend all new mothers purchase, was my Moby Wrap. It was comfortable, adjustable, and easy to use. If my daughter was ever crying and I couldn’t figure out how to get her to stop, all I had to do was put her in the Moby Wrap. It was like magic. She would instantaneously stop crying, and usually would fall asleep within five minutes. Even when she wasn’t crying, I’d put her in the Moby Wrap, and she’d be content for hours. It was an easy way for me to keep her close to me and still have my hands free.

Did you just have a baby? Congratulations, and take my advice: if you don’t already own these items, send your husband out to buy them.

We LOVE BumGenius Diapers!

It took my husband and I quite awhile to decide which route we were going to take when it came to cloth diapers. After much research and deliberating, we decided on the bumGenius 3.0 One-Size Pocket Diapers.

It may have been the best decision we’ve ever made.

I can honestly say I don’t have a single complaint about these diapers. They are awesome.

First of all, they are adorable. Yes, they are bulkier than disposables, but they come in a vivid array of colors: yellow, orange, white, as well as different shades of green, pink, and blue. Our baby happens to be a girl, and when she wears dresses, we often skip the little matching underwear that comes with the dress and go with color-coordinating diapers.

Second, they expand according to your baby’s size. That means your baby can wear the same diaper from birth to potty-training.

Third, they fasten with Velcro and stretchy tabs. I’ve heard people say Velcro doesn’t last as long on a cloth diaper as snaps do. For that reason, we purchased a few Fuzzi Bunz, which fasten with snaps, just to see if we’d like them better. Don’t get me wrong, FuzziBunz are nice diapers, but the snaps are not our favorite by any means. What is the problem with snaps? Half of the time, our daughter is between sizes. That means we either have to have the diaper on her a little too tightly or a little too loosely. Too tight, and it hurts her. Too loose, and it leaks. With Velcro and stretchy tabs, you can get the perfect fit every time.

Fourth, they are easy to care for. Rinse the poop off, throw everything into a dry diaper pail, and wash every couple days. You have to use a detergent free of dyes, perfumes, and whitening agents, but it’s probably better for your baby’s skin anyways. You also have to do two wash cycles and an extra rinse at the end, but it’s really pretty simple.

Fifth, our daughter rarely gets diaper rashes when she wears them. When we put her in disposables, we have to coat her butt with diaper rash cream to avoid her getting a horrible rash, and she sometimes gets it anyways. But, with these, she almost always has a rash-free behind. Why? I give credit to the material the diaper is made from. The part that is against her skin wicks moisture away from her bottom and onto the inserts, keeping her nice and dry.

Last, and definitely not least, these diapers contain blowouts like nobody’s business. Our girl will sometimes have poop up to her armpits when she’s in her disposables (and we don’t use generic brands – we use Pampers all the way). In a bumGenius, though, she’ll have poop explosions that would make any veteran parent cringe, and when I go to change her, it’s all neatly contained in the diaper. (Maybe “neat” isn’t the best word to describe it, but it’s contained nonetheless!) There have only been a couple times when had poop has gotten onto her clothes when she’s in a bumGenius, and it has only been a small amount. I know every parent out there who has changed a nasty blowout would love the idea of never having to clean one up again).

In our experience, these diapers are simply the best. We’ve never regretted our decision to use them.

My Decision To Stay Home

When people hear that I quit my teaching job to be at home fulltime with my daughter, they often respond, “You are so lucky that you can afford to do that.”

I indeed feel very lucky. I know I’m blessed, and I’m thankful for it. Contrary to what people might think, however, I don’t stay home because we have piles of money just sitting around. I don’t live in a situation where we have so much money that I decided I might as well not work. In fact, my husband is a fulltime student. Not only do we not have piles of money, we hardly have any. We make it work, though, because me staying home always been a priority in our family.

Our decision for me to stay home means we don’t do some of the things other couples our age are doing.

We don’t own a house, yet, and won’t have enough money for a down payment for quite awhile. Some people might call paying rent a waste of money, but I’d rather waste my money than miss out on my daughter’s baby years.

We don’t go out on dinner/movie dates often. Some may say we aren’t taking care of our marriage if we don’t regularly go out. I respond with, “Eating a good home-cooked meal and renting a movie while our daughter is taking a nap is just as romantic to us – and a lot cheaper!”

We like to be fashionable, but we do it in a different way. I don’t get my nails or my hair done professionally, but I’ve learned how to do my own nails and my own hair. We don’t buy clothes whenever we want, and we don’t buy them full-priced; however, we hit the clearance racks at the end of each season and find very nice clothes for a fraction of the price.

We don’t go on elaborate vacations. Instead, we fly to visit our family members, where the food and lodging are free. We camp instead of staying in hotels. We shop at grocery stores and cook instead of going out to eat.

Some people may call these things a sacrifice, but we don’t view it that way at all. If I ever start to wish we had more money, I try to flash-forward to when I’m eighty. When I’m eighty, I won’t look back on my life and think, “I wish we’d gone out to eat more,” or, “If only I could have gotten my nails done every week.”

In contrast, if we decided today that I should go back to work so that we could afford the things we do without, I am fairly certain that when I’m eighty, I’d have regrets. I’d wish I had spent more time with our children.

The bottom line for us is that people are more important than things. We love that the first thing our daughter sees every day when she wakes up in the morning or from her naps is one of our faces. We cherish being able to rock her to sleep. Giving her consistency in her life means more to us than anything money can buy.