Whether you’re a veteran mom or about to give birth to your first child, you probably have opinions about life with a newborn.
My husband worked in a church last year, so we built close relationships with many people. Everyone in the church felt a close connection to us, even if we didn’t know them very well. It was wonderful.
We found out I was expecting a baby in the fall, and as the due date approached, I got an increasing amount of comments from people that made me very nervous. They were comments like, “What hospital are you delivering at? We want to come see you and the baby right after you give birth!” and, “Are you going to have the baby baptized the first Sunday after it’s born?”
I always thought I’d be a laid-back mom, but I realized, after hearing these comments, how protective I am. The thought of my hospital room being flooded with well-meaning church members, quite honestly, freaked me out. I didn’t want people holding my brand new baby, and I didn’t want to sacrifice my bonding and resting time.
Even the thought of family members coming to visit filled me with apprehension. I didn’t mind my mother coming, because she’s not the type of person that will insist on holding the baby. She’s only there to help with whatever I need. However, I did not, under any circumstances, want my siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles, or anyone else coming to stay with us and visit us in the week immediately following the birth. I love them, but I wanted them to wait about a month before coming to see us. (In case you are wondering what the big deal is, anyone in my family would have to fly or drive at least 7 hours to see the baby, so it wouldn’t be a quick visit – it would be at least an overnight stay).
My ideal situation was one where I’d give birth, my mother would fly out to help with cooking, cleaning, and whatever else I needed, and the four of us (my husband, mother, baby, and I) would stay at home with the doors locked. I wanted to stay in bed all day, doing nothing but holding my baby. I wanted to nurse without having to cover myself with a blanket. I wanted my new family to have a chance to bond, without any interruptions.
I realize not everyone is like me. I know plenty of mothers who give birth on a Wednesday and are in church on Sunday. Some of my close friends had their entire extended family (or so it seemed) in their hospital room within hours of giving birth, and everyone held the baby. They couldn’t wait to get out of the house, go for walks, go grocery shopping, et cetera. To them, the joy of a new baby wasn’t complete if they couldn’t share it with others.
What type of newborn mother are you?
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